There are just 3 simple yet very hard rules that I follow when learning Body language.
These rule are what that separates novice from expert.
- Combine multiple gestures.
- Gestures should be considered in the context in which they occur.
- Apply Body language to yourself.
The first two rules are the key to accurately interpreting attitudes through body language.
You are only blinding yourself on relying on a single gesture. Read on whole, rely on whole.
The context is very important. Its a chill winter day, you see a man with arms and legs tightly crossed. Remember he is not being defensive, just cold.
"huh? Why is he staring at me?
I am freezing out here"
These rule are what that separates novice from expert.
Imagine you asked your friends to buy some chocolates for you from the near by shop. And he goes with his hand placed on his neck giving a soft smile saying "Sure dude, why not?".
And here you are thinking.. "Now, he is just saying that and a fake smile? Seriously, Who does he think he is trying to fool? He really thinks its a pain in the back. muhahahahah, I am totally an expert in body language". Well yeah, this is totally a novice's thinking.
An expert would not only conclude with just a single gesture of the hand on the neck, but would consider the situation and the other gestures too!! In reality, Your friend says "Sure dude, why not?" with a smile, his palm out and yeah, with his hand on the neck. And the situation, Poor guy has a neck pain.
"Guess i'll make him get some cheese later"
The third rule is the golden rule of all!!! I have read in articles and books that the best way to learn Body language is to read people where ever you go. WRONG. Well, that is very true though. Its a good way. But you can't completely trust those readings because mostly you are left blank without any context or multiple gestures.
So, what i would prefer my readers to do is read themselves. No one knows better about you than you yourself. Pay attention to who you are where ever you go. Learn from your own gestures. You simply have everything you need, multiple gestures.. context? how about deep inner feelings damn it!! :P
What you have learnt:
- Arms and legs tightly crossed - Defensive
- Hand on the neck - Pain in the back
- Palms out - Open and honest approach
"I did not eat those chocolates your friend
bought for you. Trust me dude"
Share your joys/suggestions/doubts through your comments.
Cheers
